She wants to go see the bluebonnets, she says.
This is after she tells me they’ve said she has three months to live.
And I want to find her vast fields of bluebonnets,
acres and acres of white-tipped blue bloom.
And I want to send her more springs to see them in,
more days to live one day at a time. I want to remove
the pain in her belly, the pain that aggressively grows.
I want to make deals with the universe. Want to say no
to the way things are. I want to tell death to wait.
I want to tell life to find a way. I want to hug her
until she believes she’s beloved. I want to give her
the pen that will write every brave thing
that she’s been unable to say. There are days
when we feel how uncompromising it is, the truth.
How human we are. There are days when the bluebonnets
stretch as far as the eye can see. There are days
we know nothing is more important than going to see them,
a billion blue petals all nodding in the wind, teaching us to say yes.
Extraordinary, Rosemerry!
Thank you, Ann … it is a very difficult poem to be living right now. xo
“teaching us to say yes”
Even when NO is all we can think, all we can feel. To truly live (even if you’re dying) is to say yes – there really isn’t any other way, is there? Namo
yes, so spot on … there really is no other way, no matter how much I would rather say no no no no no
So sorry Rosemerry. Sending out many many hugs to you. Wish I were there to give them to you in person.
Ann, thank you. I feel them. I’ll share them.