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Posts Tagged ‘connection’


 
When we met,
we had no idea
how we all, like
this land, carry 
inside us 
the memory 
of volcano
and glacier.
How easily we
can be fooled 
by the present
landscape, 
calm and serene.
Just because
there are spruce 
here now and 
gentle streams
doesn’t mean 
there wasn’t once
a violent explosion
of fire and ash, 
a long and cold 
scraping of ice. 
Here in the aftermath
of upheaval,
in this ongoing story
of transformation,
I see how our hearts 
have been carved wide 
as this high alpine 
basin, and even
in the places where 
nothing yet grows,
my god, it’s 
so beautiful.

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Kinship


                  after Jane Hirshfield
 
 
Oh look, I say to the cat
You have a soup belly. 
I jiggle and wiggle her soft, floppy middle.
She does not love it.
I get it, I say to her. Sometimes
I don’t want to be touched either.
More truly, I do want to be touched, 
but only in the way I want to be touched. 
The cat holds her paws midair, frozen there, 
as if not yet sure if to attack or relax.
She chooses relax. I choose 
to massage between her ears.
She nuzzles her small skull into my palm.
I know, I say to the cat. I miss her, too. 
We both know she’d rather be with my daughter.
We both feel the absence here. 
We sit a long time like this, the cat nuzzling, 
me dragging my fingertips forward and back, 
forward and back.
With her body, she shows me
just where and how much to touch her.
When I move to rise, she lashes out with a claw 
to keep me in place beside her.
In this way, I study my life. 
How to hold. How to let go. 
Loneliness wears a haunting perfume,
resinous, sweet, full of laughter
and silence. What a gift, I say to the cat, 
to miss her together. 
I cross the room. The cat follows to where I sit next. 
Later, she leads me to her bowl. I follow. 

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The language of grief is silence. 
—Maggie Anderson, “What Grief Does”
 
No one can translate the language of grief.
No verbs properly express how it collapses
past, present and future into a single tense
in which all becomes unswimmable wave
and at the same time immovable stone. 
No way to explain how in my grief lexicon 
the word cello can only be spoken in sob. 
How the single word shadow is somehow 
an entire prayer, equal parts praise and lament. 
How there are as many translations for loss 
as there are losses, and each phrase mutates 
into infinite local dialects spoken fluently only 
by the individual who grieves. So perhaps 
it is true, the language of grief is silence—
a mother tongue we are all gifted from birth. 
Though sometimes the language of grief is wail. 
Sometimes sniffle. Howl. Murmur. Hum. 
So different, this language, for everyone. 
And every moment, a new nuance unfolds. 
It’s a wonder we understand each other at all. 
Except we do. We share it, this language 
we can’t possibly translate and yet we know its
expressions by heart. For this, we offer each other 
our ears, knowing full well we can never 
wholly understand, knowing full well it matters 
that we listen anyway to gurgle, moan, silence, cry.

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so grateful to share 
it with you—
this loneliness

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The woman sits on the bench
in the field of clover and watches
the bumblebees clamber
 
from flower to flower. What goes on 
goes on all around her. Something
inside her is infinitely still. 
 
It invites her to enter. 
In this moment, 
everything is door.
 
She is both clover and bee, 
both air and wings.
She is what is still
 
and all that is moving. 
Is one who is sung
and one who sings. 

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The woman in 7D reads me an essay
she wrote for her husband in 7E
about how they first met at a party
 
when his hair was dark and thick. 
He is bald now. She is gray, as am I, 
but in those moments before take off
 
we three thrum with the thrill of that first 
uncertain glimpse, and I enter the Hollywood  
party with them, him in yellow suspenders, 
 
her riding high on recent success. 
They were strangers twenty minutes ago, 
but now I am cheering for them—
 
for the people they were almost forty years ago 
as they went out for coffee, then talked 
through the night. Cheering, too, for who 
 
they are now, no longer strangers, but Ellen and Bruce, 
a writer and retired architect, who will likely 
never remember meeting the woman in 7F, 
 
but for tonight, something unspeakably lovely 
happens as we fly over Chicago and Detroit
and we are woven into each other’s lives 
 
for a few hours, a momentary plot full of laughter,
tenderness, and a spontaneous, shimmering joy, 
while all around us the world goes dark. 

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It’s because to try to describe this feeling is 
to render it instantly dull, flat. 
It’s like when you see a rock on the bottom
of the river—all shimmering and bright—
but the moment you bring it to the air
to share it, what seemed precious 
becomes cloudy, mundane, a dumb lump,
the stuff of filler in a suburban parking lot.
 
And so you learn to be quiet, to let your syllables 
float away like dry leaves. What is heaviest 
stays. Does not wash away. Is polished by friction, years. 
Sometimes you meet others in the river. What shines 
shines. Together you stare, stunned by the damn beauty. 
Maybe you hold hands. Watch the light as it plays.

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The way my grandmother tended 
to her daylilies, that is the way
I want to attune to your words—
knowing how each utterance blooms
only briefly, but when cared for,
the plant itself is hardy, long lasting,
abundant, able to survive both
heat and chill, both loam and clay. 
Come love, whisper to me. 
I cherish every petal. And when
there is no bloom, I have learned 
water and fertilize anyway, to honor
the place where the bloom will be.  

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At the Table of Loss

As many chairs
as humans.
No way to refuse 
what we are served.
We choke on 
the courses.
How is it they
nourish us?
Beneath the table, 
we hold hands.

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Trust is a porcupine
sitting on the highway
in the middle of the night
not bothering to raise 
even one of his
thirty-thousand quills,
choosing instead to look
right into the oncoming 
traffic, the shine 
of a direct gaze 
more effective 
communication
than any sharpness, 
any barb.
 

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