i.
She sits in my lap, facing me,
then arches back,
dangling her arms, extending
her neck, laughing and laughing.
She knows I will not let her fall.
Mama hold me, she says.
I will hold you, I say,
and thrill that for this moment
it is true, I can hold her,
can protect her head,
can support her limbs, her smile.
We don’t get to hold each other.
Not for long. Not in the ways
that matter.
ii.
What matters?
There is snow falling
and the sky is blue.
In this moment,
everything is possible.
iii.
Prickle and petal,
muck and bright flame,
Come to me
just as you are.
iv.
Mache dich auf und werde licht
v.
My friend tells me
meet each moment
just as it comes
and not a moment before.
vi.
All day I practice leaning back,
just a tiny bit farther, a tiny bit farther,
my neck arched back, my hair hanging down,
no one to catch me
and I keep on bending.
vii.
When I cry,
I cry.
When I laugh,
I laugh.
When I cry and laugh
I gurgle and then
it’s awfully hard
to hold on
to anything.