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Posts Tagged ‘mother’


 
so full of light, this girl
walking through the airport
that watching her I see how one person
makes everything around them brighter,
even, when I am with her, me. 

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High angle shot: we see the main character,
dressed in boots, a pale orange sweater 
and a brown cowboy hat, emerging slowly 
from a theater with a throng of others. 
She looks small, vulnerable. Close up: reveals
she’s been crying, no, is still crying, but perhaps
trying not to cry. Medium shot. A beautiful young woman, 
late teens, in a gray t-shirt, long brown hair floating loose
around her shoulders, comforts the main character. 
Asks her if she would like to go for a walk instead 
of getting back in line to see another film. 
The main character shakes her head, then nods, 
laughs, even as the tears continue to fall. Insists 
that even though she cries so much, the movie 
that would be made about her is a comedy. 
The young woman rolls her eyes, nods, 
takes the woman in the hat by the hand, walks her 
away from the crowd. Long shot reveals they are 
in high mountains, the aspen not yet changing, 
but there’s a golden hue to their green. Above the aspen,
the spruce are thick, and above tree line, the sheer cliffs 
tower, red and gray, shadowed, then spangled with the kind 
of light you see in movies but can’t imagine
in your own life. But it is her own life. And she walks
with the smiling but serious young woman who is her daughter
through the unbearably beautiful set. The camera shot
changes to her point of view, focusing on the small brown bird
that sits on a railing beside her, then on the green leaves fluttering
above them, then on her own hand twined with her daughter’s,
the touch light and familiar. There are no lines for this scene
in which she wonders how she ever got lucky enough to nab 
this leading role and the supporting role in this other story.
After the preparation, the letting go. 
So much is about to change. 
She’s determined to give it her everything.

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Here, there is highway heading east and west. 
A great basin we have named The Great Basin
is rung by mountains and filled with low brush
and not much that man has touched except
this small roadside stand that describes how once
the Pony Express riders would use this rugged route,
changing horses every ten to fifteen miles. 
In the car, my daughter sleeps while my husband
and I stand in a merciless wind, reading how 
it took only two days after the first transcontinental
telegraph was sent for the Pony Express to shut down.
How much of what we rely on now will become obsolete
in a heartbeat? The postage stamp? The satellite?
When I return to the car, I squeeze the solid hand 
of my husband, trace the soft skin of my daughter’s arm,
grateful for gestures no technology can supplant.
Later, we tell inside jokes. Later, we ooh and ahh 
as lightning bisects the Great Basin. Nothing can 
replace this, I think, as my daughter tangles her hand
mindlessly in my hair and I lean in toward her touch.

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It was cold, the water, and clear, so clear,
and we swam through the center of a secret cove
in the calm, blue water, my daughter and I,
surrounded by pine trees and smooth white rocks.
 
The morning was new and the lake water still,
and no matter how far we swam, we saw 
to the sandy, white bottom. In a world of chaos, 
currents and swirl, I longed for my heart to be that clear. 
 
For a moment, it was. For a moment, I understood 
the magnitude of the gift of clear blue water 
and smooth white rocks, a strong able body 
and a secret cove. I may not know what holy means, 
 
but I know I want to give back to this world that gave me 
a gray and glorious morning swimming with my girl.
 

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not one thing growing
in the vast salt flats
but beside me my daughter sings
and I know, right here, heaven

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Five Years Ago


 
 
Everyone else has gone to bed. 
A boy and his mother sit 
at the table in the house
they are renting for a few 
more days. They are familiar
the way my eyes are familiar. 
He sees a large cockroach 
climbing the wall, and when 
his mom squeals, he gets up, 
grabs it, throws it to the ground 
with youthful efficiency, 
then smiles at his mother, 
a tender smile that says, 
I like taking care of you, mom. 
But the boy is not happy. 
Soon he is crying. His eyes
are empty, colorless, black. 
Then it is only the mother 
sitting at the table, her 
empty hands full of fear,
uncertainty, lack. Why 
do I return to this moment,
knowing I cannot change
what happens the next day?
The closet. The gun. The choice.
I go back to slip my hands beneath
the mother’s empty hands, 
making for them a nest,
then sneak up the stairs to the boy
in his room in his bed in his pain,
and though I know it will not change 
a thing, I whisper in his ear, 
there is nothing you can do 
that will keep me from loving you.   

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Now that I know for certain she will leave me, 
I dare to love her more. Her room will be empty.
The house no longer filled with her music. 
The spilling trills of her laughter too far away to hear. 
I have known since her birth she would leave me, 
but knowing is different from feeling, and her absence 
comes so soon. At the same time the heart lets her go, 
lets her go, lets her go, it leans in closer, becomes a sanctuary 
that knows no walls, a nest as wide as the world. 
At the same time I release her, I fall more deeply in love 
with the way she croons to her cat, with the feathery softness
of her skin, with how a song is ever winging from her lips. 
I welcome it, this ache. These tears were always meant 
to be cried. This heart was always meant to break. 

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for Vivian on her 18th birthday
 
 
like six thousand five hundred seventy notes 
springing out of the steps of the scales
into new surprising arrangements
she is becoming 
her own ecstatic soundtrack

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 Keep Going


 
 
The sky is already past deep rose
verging on bruised plum by the time
we enter the cemetery gates 
and walk up the hill to the grave
where the ashes of the boy I love are buried.
I’ve never been here so late. 
Didn’t know the flag pole was lit
from below so it looks like a candle,
a tall slender flame, flaring up at the end 
of a long, dark canyon. Didn’t know
how the night itself makes a quiet cocoon
for meeting the dead past the limits
of light, a shadow so generous it makes 
equal room for sorrow and love to move in.
It’s not a voice, but it is, that says,
You can never lose me.
It’s not a touch, but it is, the invisible hand
that leads me back toward home.

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Sending Love


                  for my daughter
 
 
When you were a girl 
and you’d leave for camp,
I would talk to you 
through the sky,
whispering through
blue and star-dappled 
dark. The message
was always the same: 
I love you. I hope you 
are happy. I want to gather
you a jar full of sky
so wherever you are
you can put your ear
to it and hear those simple
words translated into starlight
and sunset, cumulous
and cirrus. Sometimes 
it’s easier to trust what 
we can hold in our hands. 
But if you ever spilled
the contents of the jar, 
the love would be no less
present. In fact, you could
hold the empty glass 
to your chest and feel
how love is as uncontainable 
as wind, as insistent as thunder,
as everywhere as air. 
 

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I was sitting beside my mother on the couch,
knitting a blanket for my girl. My mother held
the yarn in her lap, a cloud of muted pinks. 
Outside, the tall dry grasses weaved 
in golden evening light. A Western Warbling Vireo 
rambled on in its jumbled, warbly way. Mom spoke 
of her plans for dinner the next night
and I knit two, purled six, knit two, purled six. 
She guided the soft wool through her fingers,
keeping just the right amount of slack. I felt
such a tide of love for her. Wanted to tell her 
I’m sorry for every time I’ve been hardened, 
every time I’ve pushed her away instead 
of pulling her close. I wanted to whisper
the love beyond words, some sentence true 
as the sweetness I felt today sitting beside her 
in the sun in the grass while we waited 
for a Belted Kingfisher or Northern Yellow Warbler 
to fly across the pond. But to name a feeling is so
much harder than naming a bird. So when the row 
was done, I rested my head on her shoulder, closed 
my eyes and nuzzled in. There was only softness 
in me then. I’d like to think she translated what 
I meant. Just as I knew what she was saying to me 
with each length of unspooling yarn: I know 
how you love me. I know your heart. I love you, too, 
my girl. By the time we rose, we were held 
by the dark. Even the swallows were quiet.

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With a white plastic five-gallon bucket
as a stool, she sits in the middle
of my garden’s gravel path and wrestles
the long notched rod through the stones.
She moves her arm slowly, 
her back hunched over her task.
I see in her body her father’s body,
how he, too, would toil in the gardens
of others for hours, tool in hand, patient
and thorough. I watch as mom dangles
a slender white root in the air 
to marvel at its twisted length.
I hear her triumphant ha!
as she adds it to the small but 
growing pile of roots and leaves.
The bindweed will grow back
with admirable speed, but she makes
an enduring mark—not in the rows,
but in the heart of this daughter, 
teaching me again how it is we find joy 
offering ourselves in service to each other. 
 

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sitting on the couch, 
our bodies lean into each other—
two aspen trees, shared roots

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What Goes On


Knowing it will grow back tomorrow
does not stop me from pulling
the bindweed today. Once I pulled 
bindweed as if the goal was to clear it 
from the garden. Now, I pull bindweed 
as if the goal is to love this act of being 
alive, this ritual of pulling bindweed, my 
daughter beside me, soft easy chatter 
rising between us.        There is no blessing 
or disaster yet that has ended this 
communion of tugging on the long white 
roots. Somehow, in this season of 
endings, the bindweed seems to promise
tomorrow, tomorrow, tomorrow. 
 

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That’s how many school lunches
I’ve made her, more or less, since
that first day she held my hand and we 
stood on the grass outside the elementary school
before the first bell rang. Her hair was blonde then, 
mine not gray. I’m not crying as I make her
lunch this morning. Dilled bean and rice salad. 
Fresh blackberries. Pretzel sticks. 
Honeycrisp apples sliced into thin rounds
that her friends call “floppy apples.”
Maybe I’m crying. 
Me and all the other mothers on the last
day of the last year of school. Thinking of
two thousand three hundred forty bleary mornings
when I woke to pour love into plastic containers
along with dried mango and tofu cubes,
seaweed strips and yogurt tubes.
Okay. So I’m crying. I nibble the squared off core 
of the apple to gather every last bit of sweetness.
When it’s gone, I lick the stickiness from my fingers.

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after “Flower in a Field” by Dario Cvencek
 
A mother is still a mother
even in an empty house, 
even when there’s not a child
hanging on her hip or leg, 
she’s still a mother even when 
the floors are clean, devoid  
of Legos and Monopoly houses. 
Even when silence 
fills the spaces where once
rang laughter, crying, singing,
even when the cake stays exactly
where she left it in the fridge, 
when her car doesn’t leave the drive
for days because no one needs 
to be taken to school or to dance. 
Even then, she’s a mother,
when the phone doesn’t ring, 
when her child can no longer
walk in the room, can’t say hello,
can’t even breathe, even then, 
even then when there is no damn way 
she can care for her child, that sad
fact does not change the fact
that she’s a mother, just as a tree 
in the field is no less tree when the saplings 
that came from its seeds are cut down, 
just as a happy memory might still 
make you happy even if it arrives
amongst tears. She is no less a mother
when the only thing that fills her arms 
is tenderness for other mothers with 
empty arms, when instead of holding
anyone, she lets herself be held. 
 

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More flowing than walking
she moves down the street,
her green dress billowing,
her shoulders bare.
Sometimes the world 
asks us to do impossible math—
for instance to add more love 
when already we are filled to capacity
with love. And again tonight, I meet it,
the impossible. 

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After fourteen years of pink leotards
and bobby pins, sewing ribbons
on pointe shoes and driving home late
from rehearsals, she dances tonight
with feline ease, confidence in the curl
of her fingers, grace in her glance
as she follows the gentle lift of her arm, 
and instead of trying to capture
this final recital in pixels, I bid myself
to be completely here, following her
leaps and feeling the fierce inner deluge 
of joy and pride and love and thrill
as for one last time she smiles 
from the stage and I see her as
the small white-winged angel who could 
barely plié, and I see her now as she soars,
almost flies, before, with a wave of her arm,
she bows, turns toward the wings, disappears.

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If I were like Suzanne Valadon,
fearlessly painting self-portraits as I age,
I would paint this moment
when I wander the high school halls
between teacher conferences, this moment
when I’m so full of love for the girl
who will graduate this spring
that I’m weeping and laughing
beside yellow lockers and posters
for basketball games. Gratefulness
can break a heart open as easily as sorrow.
In fact, the tear as it reaches the curve
of my lips, I think it would fill the whole frame.

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 Late Night Flight


 
 
Expecting my daughter to come in
late, I slept lightly, attentive
to the slightest sound.
Imagine my surprise when my son,
dead four years, came into my room
and spoke soft in my ear
to let me know he was home.
I hugged him so long. Wondered
aloud why I hadn’t been expecting him.
Let him know his sister had
taken over their old room. Together,
we sorted through his old art projects,
old shirts, old shoes. When his sister
came home we hugged her, too,
and played chase, leaping over the bed,
the chairs, laughing, squealing, alive.
Soon, I was floating—zagging
through the air with wild delight—
not because I was trying to fly, more
like I was a leaf lifted by wind, soaring
with no effort of my own. I chased them
this way, through the dream to the day,
and our laughter was then and now
and somehow inside me forever.

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