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Archive for August, 2017

PEACE

 

And there, on the to do list,

somewhere beneath “post office”

and above “pay the bills” is a single word

 

not yet crossed out. “Peace.”

You’ve written it in ink, as if

to offer it permanence,

 

an urgency that can’t be erased.

Every day, you look at it,

wondering if this is the day

 

that goodwill will come as easily

as changing the burned-out lightbulbs

or taking the garbage out.

 

You almost stop believing

you will ever cross it off.

After a while, it might seem

 

just like any other thing

you write on your list, then ignore—

like clean beneath the piano

 

or organize the garage.

But then the news will shake you,

will render your duties

 

small. And you’ll write it in

at the top of the list

in all caps, underlined in blue,

 

PEACE, not something to do,

but something to serve,

something to practice

 

as you move through the day,

something to inform the way

you fold the sheets, you drive

 

to town, you attend the meeting,

you make the call, you write

the letter, you do what must be done.

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Somewhere inside the chirpy ditty

is an urgency. I hear it now, the hunger,

the way a woman who has spent thirty days

in the rain would long for the sun.

The way someone given only lemonade

for a week would crave a glass of water.

Judy Garland, Debbie Reynolds—

you found the sweetness in the song,

a cotton candy playfulness.

But Diana, you found the arching ache

and rendered it beautiful for even

the most satisfied woman.

The tempo, unstriving. The truth

in the need to take a breath

midsentence. Tonight, I cook

the king boletes in cream.

There is something of desire in them,

the way the sherry sings like a second melody

inside the earthy taste. Diana croons behind me,

summer, autumn, winter, spring,

and I feel the urge to breathe inside my breath,

the need to stir the sauce slower, slower.

 

 

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This, too, is love, the way the beans

reach for the fence, the way the fence

does not leave the garden. The way

plants long to be touched—how

it keeps them from growing spindly

and weak. How the spider plant

on the shelf drops tiny white petals

into the cups. You could say it’s just

nature doing what nature does.

I prefer to call it love, the sunflowers

nodding their brown faces east every

morning, the lilies of the valley

spreading their generous perfume.

 

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The day she ran away from home

she didn’t pack a thing.

She just walked up the drive

and turned left and kept on walking,

Even the thistles didn’t dare ask her

where she was going. Even her shoes

were content to know nothing more

than one more step.

 

 

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It’s invisible then, the sugar,

after it’s stirred in the jar.

No one would know it is there—

it looks to be only water.

 

But sweet it is, nonetheless,

a secret, a transparent rhyme,

a hidden pleasantness,

a shrine to the unseen.

 

You are my sugar,

the fuel that no one sees,

but I know, as the water knows,

what a gift it is to receive.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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More and more, I have come to admire resilience.

            —Jane Hirshfield, “Optimism”

And when the snap peas ran out of fence to climb,

they created a living trellis of leaf and vine

and climbed up themselves and each other,

winding and twisting toward the sun.

There’s green inside our limbs, friends.

There’s braiding to be done.

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One Soundtrack

 

 

 

writing you a love song

with no measures—

it will take a lifetime to sing

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I tell myself this is how love begins,

with a grumble. A rock in the shoe.

The flowers dead. Sleet.

This is how love begins, with taunting.

With mud on its feet. It begins

when we can’t imagine loving.

It begins when there is no light.

This is how love begins. When

we’re too exhausted to fight,

and as we slump, a door appears,

and we can’t imagine not

walking through it.

 

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singing to my mother

the songs she taught me—

inside the rose hip the next rose

 

*

 

dancing in separate kitchens

together—

the red handled pans get hot

 

*

 

in the stairwell

beneath O’Keefe’s clouds—

an unexpected rain

 

*

 

what she’ll do next—

a secret even she

doesn’t know

 

*

 

reattaching the wing

on the stone crane—

longing for glue for the soul

 

*

 

unable to keep

it all together—

anything can happen now

 

*

 

my thoughts going 65

in a 30—

the red light left in the dust

 

*

 

all these cracks

where certainty can’t go—

tenderness puts down tap roots

 

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One Up a Creek

 

leak in the lifeboat—

some small part of me rejoices

for this excuse

to jump into the waves

and see what these arms can do

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