my chest filled with anxiety,
as if burrs grew in my bloodstream,
sharp barbs catching on my skin from inside.
I wanted the feeling to go away.
Wanted to know I could make everything okay.
And the burdock dug deeper in,
clinging to my heart as it would
to a sock or a sleeve or a dog.
Inside the burr was a seed of fear:
I can’t protect others from harm.
And my teacher said, her voice warm,
Let the fear of repercussions be here.
But the longing to control kept
digging into me with spines sharp and long.
Include it as part of the whole, she said.
And I thought of wild burdock
with its big soft leaves,
how naturally it grows in a field.
How it’s evolved, a product of life itself.
How the root is used to heal.
And I was stunned by the fact
that burdock belongs to the field
as much as wheatgrass,
dandelion, wild iris, wild rose—
the burr one part of the whole.
And I knew myself as field.
I imagined inside me
the grass, the sunflower, the vetch, the trees,
and the uncomfortable burr of anxiety,
which, though painful, belongs.
I focused on whatever it is
that holds it all. Inside me,
acceptance opened like a song.
*with thanks to Joi Sharp for her words (in italics)
Powerful good! Thank you and thank you every day!
Wild gratitude,
Suez
Thank you Suez! I am grateful for your comment here–oh this showing up for all the parts of ourselves, meeting them with no judgement but with compassion–it’s powerful stuff!
yes… Wild Rose does indeed belong to that fecund field! ; }
ahhhh … I think all the parts of me do!!! thanks, Laegan!
This one was so synchronistic to my life right now that I had to go away and think about it before agreeing ~ which I might never have done had I not been brought to a place in which the only potential solution lies on its path. There’s nothing more I can add till we see how it comes out ~ or ever, really, right?
oh friend … my heart opens to you as you walk on this path. Not easy!! Thanks for taking it so to heart and thinking about it. I’ve been really thinking about it, too … and feeling into it.
And feeling into it. Yes. Both arms out to the side, gaze on the horizon.