The only reason we don’t open our hearts and minds to other people is that they trigger confusion in us that we don’t feel brave enough or sane enough to deal with.
—Pema Chodron
The hands and tongue
would make quick work
of forgiveness, rushing
to shake hands, or to touch
the other’s feet, or to taste these words
I am sorry, please, forgive me,
but the body will not be hurried,
will grieve and shed and wander many
rooms of confusion and courage
before the real apology
rises in its own time
in its own way, perhaps doe-eyed
and unstartled, with such sweet
fragrance, with such compassion
you reach also for your own face
and say, I forgive you.
have to forgive yourself before you’re able to apologize to another? and it may take some time for you to get there? does seem so. too, there’s the confusion, the letting the incident(s) settle and clarify. not only do we need to open ourselves to the other, but also to our ownselves. and, yet, there still remains, “the body [that] will not be hurried.”
your poems mentions, “the _real_ apology (emphasis mine).” so there are preceding false apologies, or at least attempts at apology? yup, this also does seem so.
“but the body…perhaps doe-eyed” is may favorite passage here, and I like that touch at the end of forgiving one’s self, which is where all apology begins.